Visions of a Butterfly
by Enchanted Bliss
Summary: Harry's fifth year is full of emotional swings from Cho's new found affection to 'Mione's secret. He thinks everything is perfect, until Cho finds out that she's more related to Voldemort than she could've known. Will Harry be left heartbroken? H/C?H/Hr?


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AN:** This is my very first HP fic so I'm kind of nervously scared for weird reasons =P The fic is revolving mostly around Harry and Cho, except some unfortunate things will happen, which might result the ending to become a H/Hr one. It all depends how I'm going to twist it at the end ^_^J I hope you enjoy it because I'm racking my brains just to figure out one chapter -__-  
  
**P.S:** This fic doesn't follow along the lines of anything to do with the 'Order of the Phoenix' so it's just my whole own version of Harry's fifth year at Hogwarts.  
  
** Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the HP characters, quite obviously, they all belong to the crazily gifted J.K Rowling.  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
**Visions of a Butterfly****  
Chapter One: Tangled  
By ~Enchanted Bliss~**

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Famous Harry Potter; the boy who lived, the Gryffindor seeker, and the one who defeated the dark lord countless times, sat hunched over on his so called bed against a white plastered wall. Locks of dark ebony hair cascaded down his face, covering his once brilliant green eyes that had now lost its magnificent glow.   
  
Dull and weary orbs bore down at the moldy grey colored carpet, and if you were to look closely you could see the heavy bags under those melancholy eyes. Harry Potter no longer felt the annual urge to return to Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardy. In fact, he would have thought it better to just rot away. That would be rather pleasant. Rotting away...would be the same as dying, and Harry found that it was not as frightening anymore.  
  
He lifted his pale head, casting a side glance to his arm that now had a slight scar to it. He shuddered involuntarily, remembering exactly how that scar had gotten there in the first place. It was once again one of Voldemort's plans to rise, and this time, the dark lord had suceeded. One of the many reasons he didn't feel like going back to Hogwarts...fellow students, most likely Draco Malfoy, would probably taunt him about his soon-coming death.  
  
Yet that wouldn't really matter. He had done it all to himself anyways, it was all his fault. If only he had jumped to that trophy before Cedric...if only he wasn't acting all heroic and noble...everything would have been at least better. He knew many probably thought Cedric's death was his doing, and he couldn't really blame them for thinking that way. The only comfort he felt was that his closest friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, were still on his side...but what about Cho?  
  
Cho Chang...Ravenclaw seeker, attractive, popular, and atheltic Cho Chang. Harry's all time crush...would she think Cedric's death was all because of him too? He fell backwards onto the soft matress, his weight causing it to groan slightly. He could still see the images of all the remorsefull faces...and espeically Cho's. She must've cried. He had noticed during the end of the year feast...her round brown eyes were slightly red.   
  
He ached. It was his fault once again wasn't it? He had caused her to shed tears...all his fault.  
  
He punched the wall, white paint chipping around his tight fist as red seeped out of his pale and sweaty hands.  
  
The boy who lived wondered...when the pain would ever cease.  
  
  


~*~

  
  
  
The perpetual rain pounded against the window pane of a certain young girl's bedroom. A pair of glassy amber eyes were staring intently at the droplets hitting and bouncing off the glass.  
  
Cho Chang was depressed. Maybe even more than that. Heartbroken? Yet her emotions didn't seem to fit that definition either. Her first love, Cedric Diggory, was gone. Dead. Nothing but a mere memory to all those that remembered his glowing eyes and dashing smile. She had spent most of her summer wondering...why? Why Cedric? He was nothing but an innocent champion of Hogwarts for the Triwizard Tournament. He did nothing wrong...he was basically in the wrong place at the wrong time. And they_ killed_ him. Bloody hell, they simply killed him. Just because he was...there? With Harry?  
  
Harry. That name brought her even more memories of the previous year at Hogwarts. She also felt ashamed. Cho didn't exactly know Harry Potter that well at all...infact the longest conversation they probably had was when he had attempted to ask her to the Yule Ball. She had been rather surprised that famous Harry Potter had asked her, yet she couldn't go with him. She had Cedric. But now she didn't.  
  
At first she had blamed it on anyone she could think of. Namely Harry. She couldn't help herself but blame him at first, though she didn't scream or yell at him. Her fury was just burning silently in her heart. Why was it always Harry Potter that lived to tell the tale? Why Cedric? Not Harry? Harry was the one who should've died, he was the one who the dark lord wanted in the first place. Yet he lived, once again, and the innocent died. Not meaning that Harry wasn't innocent of course...but why Cedric?  
  
Cho had consulted the wise headmaster of Hogwarts before leaving at the end of her fifth year. She didn't know why, but she had so many questions. Why did the cup become a portkey? Why did Cedric die? What happened there? Those questions came tumbling out of her pink flushed lips in one blur.  
  
Yet she got her answers, and still she didn't feel completely satisfied. She understood Harry's intentions...being the brave, loyal, noble Gryffindor he was; he naturally wanted Cedric to go get the cup. And then they both agreed to take it and one of them get themselves killed! Cho sighed deeply, spinning around in her chair, her back facing the window now.  
  
Her eyes landed on a stack of letters on her white polished desk. She frowned as she took out her wand from her pocket and pointed lazily at the stack of letters. "_Diffindo_."  
  
She watched, almost amused, at the ripping of the letters as they shred piece by piece under the spell. The letters were probably all containing the same things anyways.   
  
Are you ok Cho?  
  
Oh my gosh...I'm so sorry Cho...  
  
Cho...please be ok, we all want you happy...  
  
Cho had, had enough of that during her first few weeks back at home. Dozens of owls came weekly and hence there whole front yard had gotten covered with a variety of owl feathers. Her mother had been furious, but yet she understood that her daughter's friends were only worrying.   
  
The sixteen-year-old girl tossed the shreded letters into the wastebasket without hesitation. She was Cho Chang afterall, she was suppose to be happy, heading towards her bright future, and she was suppose to be strong. She rarely cried, but sometimes...things got to heavy and she would basically burst like a balloon.  
  
_Tap tap  
  
_She was interupted from her train of thoughts as the ceaseless tapping continued at her window.   
  
Cho turned to look over her shoulder, seeing a rather weather beaten snowy owl pecking with frustration. "Oh you poor thing..." She stood up and made her way to her window. She opened it, letting the coldness blow into her room as the snowy old tumbled in quickly.  
  
It shook itself, scattering droplets of water all around the room, but Cho didn't mind. She hadn't seen this owl before, and it looked rather proud and bold that it had made it through the pouring rain.  
  
"I wonder..." Cho untied the parchment and unrolled it to see handwriting that she could not recognize.  
  
_ Dear Cho,_  
  
_You probably don't recognize Hedwig, or my writing, but that's because I've never sent you a letter or anything...but anyways, I'm sorry. I really don't know why I'm writing this to you, but I'm so frustrated that I just have to get one thing off my  
shoulders. You probably think that Cedric's death was my fault...and I'm not going to blame you for that. I would've done anything to_ _ have stopped it...but I could not...it all happened to fast. I'm sorry...I'm sorry to everyone that knew Cedric. I can't help but think_ _that I could have stopped it, if only I had...taken the cup...ok, well I'm not going to bother you any longer...I just want you to know tha_t_ I'm sorry. You're probably getting tired of all those sorry notes and everything, but the stress in me is killing. I better go now, I have to cook breakfast before my 'family' wakes up. _  
  
_Sincerely Harry Potter_  
  
  
She blinked, and re-read the letter several times, and by then she had realized the owl, Hedwig, was almost dry already. "Oh! I better send you back to Harry shouldn't I?" Her voice trailed off as she eyed the letter again.  
  
Cho didn't really know what to do...but she knew that she couldn't blame Harry at all. She felt even more awfully ashamed at the moment that she had ever thought about blaming him during the first week of summer holiday. Cho pulled out a scrap piece of parchment and yanked out her quill from her drawer as she hastily wrote back.  
  
_Dear Harry,  
  
It's ok, I'm not blaming you. No one should. I understand...it's not your fault. You didn't know it was coming, no one did. You don't need to say sorry...I mean, I think I should apologize to you. You must be going through alot...and I wish you well.  
  
Sincerely, Cho Chang._  
  
  
Cho read her letter over. It was short, but it was everything she felt at the moment. Was it pity for the boy? Possibly...it was always Harry Potter...it was always him going through all the struggles with he-who-must-not-be-named. And he didn't ask for it.  
  
She quickly tied the letter to Hedwig's outstretched claw, receiving an affectionate nip on the fingers before the owl took off through the opened window that she had carelessly forgotten to close.  
  
  


~*~

  
  
  
The darkness seemed to engulf his very being, the area around him, and simply everything in sight. He found it rather irritating, not being able to see what was lying ahead of him except for the darkness.  
  
The silence was broken by the raspy breathing from himself, and the echoing footsteps that seemed to sound like it was coming closer and closer. He stopped in his tracks, blinking furiously and squinting his emerald eyes to make out anything; an outline of a figure or at least some shadow. Yet he failed to see anything, and the footsteps continued until he was sure this figure should be standing right before his eyes.  
  
Nevertheless, the darkness was still as thick as before.  
  
He raised one clamy hand, reaching out but grasping nothing but thin air. He heard laughter...musical laughter...belonging to a feminine voice. His whole body shivered from the souless laugh when suddenly a pair of familiar red slint like eyes flashed before him.  
  
He fell back in pure horror, then noticing that he wasn't hitting solid ground...but he was falling. Falling deeper and deeper into endless darkness, and he could be sure that those eyes were Voldemort's.  
  
Falling and falling, and somehow, he was able to see a shadow now. Coming ever so closely. The figure of a girl's, with straight shiny hair below her shoulders. This girl was coming closer and closer, until he could tell that the girl had very healthy looking lips of pearly pink...surely this girl was rather beautiful?  
  
But he was wrong.  
  
The shadows lifted and what he saw was a gaunt ghost like face with those same menacing red eyes that pierced his very soul.  
  
He screamed.  
  
  


~*~

  
  
  
Harry jolted awake, finding himself not on his bed but in a tangle of his blankets near the foot of the bed instead. His scar burned steadily while he winced in pain.  
  
He wasn't feeling very well at all. Not after his nightmare. But something startled him greatly, for his dream wasn't his usual dreams of Cedric's death and Voldemort's rise, or his parents tumbling out of Voldemort's wand. It was simply an unexplainable dream...but he was sure he saw Voldemort in that dream.  
  
And a girl. A stranger?  
  
Harry rubbed his temple furiously, standing up on his unsteady feet as he made his way to the washroom across from his room which once belonged to his cousin, Dudley.   
  
He turned on the tap, feeling the cool water rush down on his hands as he splashed the refreshing liquid onto his sweaty face. Harry made a mental note to himself that he should wash his hair since it was getting too greasy for him to bare. He frowned at his reflection.  
  
His cursed scar seemed like the only thing that didn't change. It was still as visible and hideous as it always was. Harry had grown a few inches, but that didn't seem to help because it made him look even more lanky and skinny than ever before.  
  
Life seemed uneventful now, even though the dark lord was out there somewhere, steadily rising and gaining power. Harry threw that thought aside. He was tired. Maybe he wouldn't have to save the world again and maybe he could just be a by-stander like so many other wizards and witches out there.  
  
Retreating back into his room, he noticed that Hedwig was perched outside his window, looking furiously impatient.  
  
He darted towards the small window and quickly opened it for his worn out owl. "You've got a letter for me?"   
  
Hedwig tilted her head and stuck out its right foot, revealing a rolled up piece of parchment tied together with a piece of blue ribbon. Harry hastily untied it, his eyes darted to the bottom and saw that it was from Cho. She had replied to his letter!  
  
Somehow light seemed to creep into the dark corners of Harry's depression as he suddenly felt rather...light. Maybe Cho wasn't mad at him!  
  
He read the letter over quickly at first, and when he had assured himself that it was not a letter that blamed him, he let out a sigh of relief. Cho didn't blame him! Harry could feel a slight twitching near the corners of his dry and cracked lips as a small smile finally spread on his face.  
  
It was one simple letter that was much shorter than his, but it made all the difference.  
  
  
  
  
  
AN: Hope you enjoyed that chapter. If you see any spelling mistakes that I've missed, you can point them out if ya want =P The plot isn't really rolling yet, but soon it will! Thanks for reading!  
  
  
  
  
  



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